2002-08-04
Yawn, posted at 12:49 a.m.
Epiphany in Baltimore has moved to epiphanyinbaltimore.blogspot.com Today was a good day.I woke up way early for a Saturday, knowing I had a lot of work to do today. On the list of items to do was to go to the bank and deposit a check, to work out and do my six-mile run, to go grocery shopping, to mow my yard, and, especially, to do my laundry. It'd been about three weeks, maybe more, and the mountain of dirty clothes was getting high.
I accomplished everything, except for the mowing, and I have the excuse that it was raining when I wanted to do it. I was at the bank before it opened, then headed to the gym. I did my six-mile run again, and, for the first time, felt like I could have gone three miles farther. I didn't, though, because I was supposed to play racquetball tonight and didn't want to push myself too much. I'll increase my run length very soon. I'm still behind most marathon schedules I've seen, but I'm ahead of a couple of them. During this training process, which I guess is about a month long now, there have been many moments when I've thought that there's no way I can finish a marathon, that I better stop telling people I'm going to do it. But not today. Today, there is no doubt in my mind that I will do it.
I then went shopping at Trader Joe's, headedback to my house to put away the perishables, and almost immediately went to the laundromat before I had a chance to sink into the couch or the chair in front of the computer. Actually, we had a horrible storm last night, and it rained in the window onto the computer, and it made my keyboard not functional. So I couldn't sit down at that point, anyway. I ended up going to Office Max during my errands and buying a cheap new one for $14.
By the way, I really can't enjoy summer storms anymore. I used to love them, but since 9/11, I can't hear rumble of thunder or the crack of lightnight without thinking about war and bombs. First of all, my basement bedroom is positioned such that I can't really see what's going on outside. I just hear loud booms and see flashes of light. I remember the first storm after 9/11 - I actually hid under a table because I thought we were being bombed. I didn't literally think that last night, but it was in the back of my mind. Every time I heard thunder, it didn't sound like thunder to me, but the roar of low-flying planes. Every time lightning struck the ground, I thought of bombs. I began to think about how ingenius it would be to bomb a country during a thunderstorm, because no one would know what was going on until it was all over. It did freak me out a little, although I realize the fear is quite a bit irrational.
Needless to say, I didn't sleep very well until after the storm ended. When I awoke, I realized part of the reason it was so scary - the storm was very intense. Lightning and strong winds had whipped through the city without remorse. Branches and many trees lay in the streets, and traffic lights throughout the area were without power. It was a bad storm.
Anyhow, back to my day. I made it over to the laundromat and spent way more money than any person should ever spend at a laundromat. (Hint: I had to change a whole $20 bill into quarters.) I filled up two 50-lb washers, a 35-lb washer, and an 18-lb washer. That's 153 pounds of laundry. Woah. Now, it was not all my clothes - much of it was rugs from the bathroom of my departed roommates' toilet area, there was a couple of throw blankets, Tobey's bed, and a couple of other odds and ends. But, yes, I have a lot of clothes. That, and I have about four boxes of clothes that are now too big for me that I need to deliver to goodwill. My old roommate Jake used to joke that I could clothe a small village, and now it's more true than ever, as so many of my clothes don't fit any more. But I still feel the need to buy more clothes. Not only do I need smaller clothes in pretty much every area - I'm now officially a size 32 pants, down from 40, and am now officially a "L" in shirt size, down from "XXL" - but I'm also trying to totally transition my underwear collection from briefs to boxer briefs, as well as to buy more plain white t-shirts and tank tops to wear underneath outer clothes. I'll give an example of something I don't have any more: khaki shorts. Doesn't every guy have khaki shorts? I tried to put my old ones on the other day, but they fell down. I tried a belt, but I think of wearing belts with shorts as something my father would do, and it looked all bunched up and silly anyway. So I'll get a pair soon. I also think buying new clothes is something of a motivator for my working out; it still blows my mind what I can fit into now compared to what I could fit into then.
In other news, I cried today. Yup, I really balled my eyes out! I was listening to the last tape of the six-tape audiobook version of A Lesson Before Dying, and the last parts of it really got me. What a great novel. There were parts of it that I thought were slow, but the last half of the book is incredible. The basic plot of the book is this: "In the segregated rural Louisiana of the 1940's a retarded African-American youth is wrongly convicted of murder. Another African-American, a teacher, is persuaded to visit the condemned man in his cell and convince him that he 'ain't no hawg.' The relationship that grows between them and its effect on the teacher's worldview are the heart of this bittersweet, humane novel..." Anyhow, I loved it. Oddly enough, I could relate to so many things about the narrator, despite the obvious race/class/era/situation differences. I, too, have struggled with faith and religion. I, too, don't feel like I have many answers. I, too, often struggle with my purpose in life, and look to others for inspiration and even redemption.
The ending - and you can guess what happens, just based on the title of the book - is heartwrenching. Ernest Gaines, the author, doesn't tell it straight, though; he starts to play around with narrative voice at the end, and we see the situation from all around. I loved this book. The cry made me feel a little silly (I was at a red light when it really started to come, in between my 4th and 5th errands of the day), but I just let it come and it felt nice and cathartic. I don't remember the last time I shed a tear.
This is a book I'll be fighting to add to our curriculum. Down with The Chosen!
Hmmm... not much else is new. I haven't done much since I returned with my laundry. Mike and I had planned to play racquetball and go to a movie, but his wife ended up having the night off, and of course that means he can't do anything with friends. Renee and I were going to go to the movies, but I ended up not feeling like going out. I was tired, and thought I might head to bed pretty early. It's now 1:17am, so I guess that's not going to happen. I had a good evening of weightlifting, finally watching my DVD of the movie O (I had never seen it, but found the DVD really cheap so I bought it. I didn't finish the movie, it was a bit disappointing, but I'll get back to it), watching some Sex and the City (I can't believe Kim Catrall got nominated for an Emmy. She has horrible timing. But I'm liking the show more and more), watching Saturday Night Live, and reading my cousin's new diary all the way through. She's 14 and I get to see her on August 21. Victoria is very intelligent, and I told her about diaryland and that I thought she'd have fun with it. Well, she apparently is related to me, because that was 15 days ago and she's got 18 entries already! She's still figuring out some things with it, and I'm quite sure she hasn't learned that I have a journal on here as well. That would just be too weird. I keep checking her profile to see if she puts any diaries on her "favorites"... none yet. That's a good sign.
Did I mention my new roommate moved in yesterday? He's gone back home now after dropping his stuff off, but I'll write about that later. Nothing too interesting... except his bed won't fit up the stairs and we accidentally put a hole in the drywall trying to wedge it up there. I think we'll get along fine. I don't remember the pseudonym I gave him now, but I'm sure I'll probably talk about him a lot on here as I adjust to living with someone I don't know again.
I'm off to bed.