Saturday, Jan. 11, 2003
Oh she was so damned beautiful that she'd warm a winter's frost, but she looked long past lonely..., posted at 11:54 p.m.
Epiphany in Baltimore has moved to epiphanyinbaltimore.blogspot.com It's been a long evening, full of moderate listlessness, relaxing ennui, and lots of music. I haven't left the house since 4pm, and have alternated between grading papers, watching TV, and playing with my CD burner for the last seven hours or so. It's been a dull evening, but this is something that I needed.I have many thoughts jogging through my mind right now, but one is an odd one: I think I want to get a tattoo. I never would have considered one before the weight loss, but now that I wear tank tops everyday at the gym and have gained confidence I didn't realize I had, I would consider it. The other stickler is that I never could think of an image that would justify permanence on my body.
Now, though, I think I have it: Baltimore. I feel like I have grown remarkably since my move here. Woken up. Figured out in a lot of ways who I am and who I am not. Became an adult. I'm not sure if this sort of transformation or growth could have occured if I had remained in Michigan, as living on my own in a state where I knew nobody has shaped me into the person I am right now at this moment. There certainly have been some rocky times here, but I've picked myself up after getting slammed against the rocks and swam to safety and beyond. Being in Michigan for ten days or so made me realize how important this city and its inhabitants are to me.
There truly has been an Epiphany in Baltimore.
So, I'm not going to get a tattoo today, or even in 2002. But, perhaps when I do leave Baltimore, that will be my tribute to the city where I became a man.
***
Supertechie was the only person to get the correct response from the last entry's "Other folks will look at me with envy and with greed, and I'll revel in their attention" title. It came from Tracy Chapman's bitter "Mountain O' Things." I've been listening a lot to her beautiful new album, which has some stunning moments. But a part of me definitely misses the pissed off, political folksinger with the choked soprano that taught me the importance of social protest in music years ago.