2000-10-15
Wild Weekend in the Wendy City, posted at 22:19:29
Epiphany in Baltimore has moved to epiphanyinbaltimore.blogspot.com What a weekend.I just got back from Chicago, where I decided to drive on Saturday. I had one of the funnest nights of my life, a spirited jaunt through a city I'd love to get to know better. I'll spare you the scintillating details, but hopefully the aftereffects of this night will reverberate and inspire me to reflect and refocus on my certain aspects of my life a bit more. How's that for cryptic? ;)
I met a friend, and what a great tour guide they were. What a cool town. Why have I never explored this city before, when it's an easy 3.5/4 hour drive away? Seems like a waste to me. Why do I spend every Friday night going to the movies? Or, if we get really inspired, a dueling piano bar in Lansing? With the resources and excitement of a major metropolis just a relatively short drive away, I feel like I've not gotten the most out of my early 20's.
Okay, so now Chicago is on my list of cities that would be fun to live in. Chicago, Boston, Detroit, NYC, Myrtle Beach, Pheonix, San Francisco. Where to go, where to go? Being in Chicago for one night made me again more excited than ever about going to a major urban city to get my first teaching job. It also gave me a lot of trepidation about it - in a place so huge, how would I make friends? Where would I hang out? Would I be lonely? (or, any more lonely than I usually feel?) Wow, that parenthetical line sure was depressing. Lately, I've been big into not going back and deleting stuff that I write, because I figure it's what I really wanted to say. So I'll just try to explain it. I'm actually not that lonely anymore. But if you had asked me last year at this time, I was beyond lonely - I think I was clinically depressed. Now, I just sort of wish I could get my shit together and figure out what exactly I want out of life and relationships. Do I want anyone to know the real me? Why or why not? Why do long drives always make me think about depressing stuff?
My life is still going really well. Don't let my over-reflectiveness concern you. I'm happier than I've been since high school. And I feel like I'm on the verge of even more fulfillment.
A big urban area is so cool. As my tour guide pointed out, Chicago has a slew of cultures that co-exist peacefully despite literally bumping into each other. That's the kind of diversity that I think I would thrive on. I long for a chance to really explore a city like that.
Friday night was fun, too. Gale, Jenni, Erin, and I went to the movies. Despite my condescending line earlier about spending every Friday at the movies, I still love doing it. Saw "The Contendor". Decent movie, even though it lost a lot of its power with a bizarrely unlikely plot twist in the last fifteen minutes. Still, I would watch Joan Allen read a phonebook, and the late plot twist didn't affect my overall enjoyment in the picture. Afterwards, I talked politics with Gale (who's probably reading this now!) and hung out with the other two back at Erin's place. Fun night.
I feel funny.