Tuesday, Jun. 24, 2003
Don't worry, I'm not really going to send out this e-mail, posted at 5:15 p.m.
Epiphany in Baltimore has moved to epiphanyinbaltimore.blogspot.com Dear Michelle:It's great to hear from you. The news from you is big and exciting - the baby coming in January, the purchase of your new home, and your acceptance into the Master's Program. Wow - that's really amazing. I'm so happy for you.
As for me, as you asked things are... okay. I've just closed out the second year of teaching, and I'm happy to say that I feel like I'm pretty good at it. With the rapid turnover of our staff, I'm now one of the veterans, and I even get to mentor a new teacher next year. Coaching baseball continues to be fun, and I work with great young minds every day - who couldn't be happy with that?
Personally, though, things suck. I got my heart broken this spring for the first time ever. Remember that girl, the one you met at my birthday at BW-3 last time I saw you? Well, we got together for this wonderful week between Christmas and New Year's, and I had full expectations that things would progress to the next level very quickly. She made noises about moving down here to Baltimore, and I thought I was head over heels. Until I heard she was dating someone else and hadn't found the need to tell me.
So that sort of sucked. I was down in the dumps for a while, but now I've decided that it was meant to be, and perhaps that I wasn't really in love at all - I was just really happy with our friendship, and that's what I still miss. I feel like all is lost, and that's depressing as hell. I think all I can hope for is that she turns over another leaf in therapy (I was leaf #1) and realizes that the friendship was worth holding onto and she should call me back. But it probably won't be for a while, I'm expecting. I wouldn't let her too close to me if she were to call any time soon, and I think she's too focused upon herself right now anyway to reach out.
Oh well.
I'm now saving up my feelings for another woman, one that I may or may not have met yet. I envy your upcoming parenthood, because I find myself naming my imaginary kids in my mind more than ever lately (current faves: Zora, Mallory, Madison and Cameron, Maxwell, and, no, I haven't been listening to too much R&B lately) and really think in some ways (all but financial and relationship-al, two huge ones), I'm ready.
This summer will bring some bliss, hopefully. I'm heading out of the country for the first time ever on Monday, leaving on a jet plane for Italy with my friend Bill. I'm spending two weeks there, carousing through Verona, Rome, Venice, Sienna, and Milan, and should have a great time. Money is the only obstacle, and it's certainly a significant one. But hopefully all will work out. That's what I keep telling myself, at least. Who cares about August rent?
My dad retires at the end of July after 25 years as a cop. I'm happy for him, and hopefully he finds something else meaningful to do with his time. His retirement is sort of another roadsign on the "You're getting older, Mark" road (along with the blinking "You're losing your hair" sign), but all will be well. I'm still happier, more satisfied, and genuinely appreciative of the world than I ever was in college. I'm still irrepressible.
Irrepressibly, your old friend,
Epiphany