2001-06-13
Job Stress, posted at 12:44 p.m.
Epiphany in Baltimore has moved to epiphanyinbaltimore.blogspot.com I am not seeing eye to eye with my supervisor. I either love him or I don't. Not much middle ground. Right now, I'm in the latter stage. Every little thing I do wrong is pointed out and underlined for all to see. Our styles are not meshing. I am currently dreading going in to work. I hope this doesn't last much past training. Perhaps when I was looking back at last summer, I was seeing it with rose-colored glasses. Or remembering the time when he was gone. I don't know. I just don't know.Thankfully, the rest of the staff seems great. If only I could stand up to him better, if only he'd be a bit more accepting. If only I was done living in the dorms for good. But then I wouldn't have free air-conditioning.
Thank god the job only lasts eight weeks. 1.5 down.
I'm gonna hate leaving these kids. Today was the last day with my lovable 6th hour brats. My principal pissed me off today, though. I'm working for peanuts without so much as a "How are you doing?" from him, but he called me down today because he heard I was just letting kids go after their finals. Well, I wasn't. And it makes me mad that the first time he goes out of his way to talk to me, it's sort of a disciplinary issue. I don't put much credence into what this man says, but still... I'm feeling woefully unappreciated right now with my $70/day wage. That, folks, averages out to about $6/hr with all the planning that goes into my teaching. It sucks - about a third of what a real teacher makes. Good thing I love what I do. And good thing I'll have an actual salary next year.
I am finding little ways to get back at the district for their penny-pinching, though. We're currently on exam schedule, which means we meet with two classes every day - 1st and 3rd was yesterday, from 7:45-9:45 and 9:55-11:55, respectively. Today was 5th and 6th, with the same time frame numbers. I have planning fifth hour, so what did I do? I got up at 7:30, went to the gym, showered, ate breakfast, and got to school at around 9:40. Was I supposed to be there? Yes, technically. Did anyone notice that I wasn't? Of course not. What would I have done if someone had noticed? I would have said I forgot something at home and had to run back real quick. Does that make me a bad person? Perhaps. But I'm stressed and exhausted, so I felt like it was important time for me.
Soemtimes I wish I wasn't so passive agressive and indirect.
Olin described something in his most recent diaryland entry that I'll have do be doing soon - making my diary more anonymous. As of now, I of course have named my diary after my real first and last name, and pretty much call everyone by their real name in my entries unless I feel the need not to. But soon I'll be a real teacher, and there's just too much stuff on here to leave it up under my name. I'm starting to think about how to switch over to a different name, and thought it would be a simple process. However, from the way Olin described it, he's having to copy over all his old entries. I now have almost 200. That will be quite a task. More on what I'm going to do with this later.